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Learning To Accept My Makeup-Free Face
How I stopped feeling so self-conscious about leaving the house without mascara…
It used to be so easy to get ready in the morning when I was a kid. I’d throw on some clothes, quickly brush my hair (or when I was really little, ask my mom to braid it), and run out the door without another thought.
This changed around the time I was fourteen. I don’t exactly remember the decision-making process that led me to start wearing makeup, but I think it was some combination of seeing that other girls I knew were doing it, noticing that my eyelashes were quite pale, and, I suppose, wanting to impress a boy I had a crush on at the time.
I didn’t wear a lot — I was fortunate as a teenager to have relatively clear skin, so I rarely wore foundation — but I started wearing eyeshadow and mascara most days. Lipgloss and eyeliner were added shortly after.
This remained the case for years, and like many women I got so used to how I looked with makeup that I felt uncomfortable and self-conscious without it. By the time I was in my late teens, I never went to school or social events without at least eye makeup, and the idea of anyone seeing me bare-faced was horrifying. I remember going on a trip with one of my friends in college and realizing that I’d either have to leave my makeup on all night or risk them seeing me…
